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Friday, April 24, 2009


I feel like want to cry. I had to throw away an unused, 5oz, thawed frozen breast milk. Yes, you hear me right. I HAD TO THROW AWAY AN UNUSED, 5OZ THAWED FROZEN BREAST MILK. (Well, it is actually still inside my fridge, as I feel so heavy to throw it away. However, I know I have to, as it is not good to drink already.) How this will happen?

Apparently, Hao did not finish his milk for the day on the day before. However, the babysitter did not tell me about it. Therefore, I still gave her the same amount of milk this morning when I sent Hao over to her house. She did mention to me this morning that Hao seems like does not like to drink those milk anymore. However, so far I have no problem nursing him at home. He did not show the sign does not want me breastfeeding him. In fact, he is looking forward to it every night.

When I went to pick up Hao after work, the babysitter told me tomorrow no need to bring any milk to her. Hao did not want to drink the milk. He just finished whatever left over from yesterday. And the BM that I gave her this morning remained untouched. Well of course, Hao won’t want it. Everyday, I gave the babysitter both expressed BM and frozen BM. I expected all milks to be finished on that day itself. Therefore, I did not tell her, which one is frozen, that Hao had to take first and which one could be later. And any leftover milk from the milk bottle, if not being consumed within the next 1-2 hours, had to be discarded (the same rule apply to formula milk too). And thawed frozen BM cannot be kept until the next day. I don’t think she knows all this. Obviously, Hao would not want that ‘old’ milk, as they did not taste good anymore. But she should have told me this yesterday.

As I did not give her any formula milk powder to stand by, I wonder if Hao was not taking the BM, what he takes? The babysitter said he just take the normal cereal and porridge. Other than that, he did not want the milk. I did not understand, wont he feel hungry? Just when I wanted to ask more questions, I heard the babysitter was telling Hao “嘿, 长大了囖, 知道不好吃了啊.” (means now you have grown up, you know the BM does not taste good.) After hearing this, I could not hold back anymore.

Immediately I told the babysitter in a very stern and serious tone, showing my unhappiness and disagreement “Aunty, how can you be so negative. I’m very sensitive to this. Breast milk is the best milk in this world. All this while you like to ask me when am I going to stop breast-feeding. Commenting the texture of the milk, the taste of the milk etc. Milk is not the main food for baby after 6 months old. In fact, the paed just told me to replace one of his milk with semi solid food. This is the beauty of the breast milk; it will adjust to the baby’s need. However, despite all the benefits, you are not encouraging at all. Even if the baby is rejecting the milk, this is his choice. How can you tell the baby it does not taste good? Well seems like the baby is listening to you now.”

I dislike this babysitter as she has been acting and talking negatively all this while. I and hubby already have plan to change babysitter for Hao. But I did not expect such thing would happen before Hao switch to new babysitter. When Hao was about 7 months, I requested the babysitter to cook porridge for him. She told me Hao did not like to take porridge. I did not rely on the babysitter. I took my own initiative to find out what Hao likes and what he does not like and updated the babysitter. Apparently she did not listen to me. One day, she told me Hao was not ready to take porridge yet as he vomited right after taking the porridge. Well I did not have such problem back at home here. I did not argue with her. I just checked with her how she cooked the porridge and the texture of the porridge. I doubt she cooked it in the way that Hao likes.

She stopped cooking porridge for Hao after that day. I did not get mad at her. One or two weeks later, I asked her about it. I told her back at home during weekend, Hao’s evening meal was on porridge, no more milk. So far, I had no problem feeding him porridge. Only after hearing me saying this, she resumes giving him porridge and no more complains from her on this.

I gave her a box of Baby Bites biscuit when Hao reaching 6 months old earlier. I told her to give to Hao as snack. After 2 months later, I checked with her. She told me the biscuit is like the Japanese rice biscuit, she thinks it’s too hard for Hao. Therefore, she did not give him. I was like – what? If I did not ask, means she won’t tell me about it. I assured her the biscuit is soft enough to give to a baby. Lynn started eating those biscuit when she was 5 months plus. I personally also had given Hao those biscuit to eat and he knows how to eat those biscuit. Very obvious she made her own judgment without trying it. Still after that, she did not give it to him. She complained to me that Hao did not like to drink plain water. I suggested change to sipping cup for him. This happened to Lynn before. She also did not like to drink plain water from milk bottle. But she’s ok after we change her to sipping cup. Guess what the babysitter told me? She said Hao won’t want to drink from the sipping cup (how she knows if she never try?), he does not know how to drink from the sipping cup (no one come to this world know everything, we have to learn). She even asked me to try first, if he drinks then only give her the cup. Well I did try at home. Hao did not reject sipping cup. But I did not tell the babysitter. There are many incidents already. Since she won’t listen to me, I let her do the way she wants. She is being lazy. She thought as long as the baby is not grumpy, not cranky, she has done her job. All the babies that she previously take care, the parents only brought the baby back home during weekend. I doubt those parents know how this lady take care of their child.

Since then, we know she is a very negative person. She uses the same method same way on all babies, but we know this will not work as every baby is unique. In addition, a baby needs a positive environment to grow. Hubby and I have been talking about changing babysitter. We actually have decided to send Hao to the same playschool that Lynn is going now. We just need to sort out some of the arrangement.


Kit76 said...

Yep. Change.

eugene said...

hi,cheeyee,please always check on the babysitter,i have had bad experience with one,on the surface,all ok but upon cheking her out,baru tahu kesannya,,,,,

btw,this is solely my advice

cheeyee said...

Eugene - I do, in a moderate way. As long as she is not too much, I still can keep one eye close and try to do more on my part here during weekend instead of fully relying on her. Both hubby and I are working late, we have been searching for babysitter for very long time. Not that we are not willing to pay more, is people does not want to take care till late. :(

Oliveoylz said...

CheeYee, yes, it's time to change babysitters. Hope you can find a good one which supports breastfeeding and can give a positive and loving environment to baby Hao! The babysitter doesn't sound very accommodating to your requests...I can imagine the stress u're going through...You are a supermom, expressing all the BM even when u have to work late. I salute u!

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